Week 14

I had to do something today that I had been dreading from the moment I had my children. I think of myself as being a pretty open person, able to talk about anything with anyone. That was not the case today. While I paced back and forth in my livingroom waiting for my son to get done what ever he was doing in his room, and hoping that when he came down the hall that I could open my mouth and ask him to come talk to me. I know the minute the words were out that he would not be able to look at me and I would have a hard time looking at him. I have to do this because of his age not that we haven’t talked about this subject before but not the way I feel we needed to now. All I could keep thinking as I paced some more is “shouldn’t his father have had this talk with him?” Well hell yes, this is a father, son moment. Why had I listened when my husband said “you work with kids you can talk to him better then me.” What a cop out and I fell for it.
How do you talk about sex with your fifteen-year-old son, with out having him run out the door? Do you make light of it with him and just say in passing and hope he understands? Should I sit at the table or maybe in the livingroom with the television on? Maybe I should cook him something and while his mouth is full bring it up. No, bad idea he would probably choke. I’m just going to do it casually and hope it goes well. What I really want to say is I’ll kill you if you ever have sex before you’re an adult. But I remember being his age and if my parents ever said that I would have done the opposite.
Why didn’t I look it up on the Internet I might have been able to print off a dialog to use? I should have bought a book, or set away for a pamphlet. That way when my jaw locks up I could have just handed it to him, or I could have left it in his room and hope he would read it.
Okay, here we go.

Hey, “Nate come in the livingroom I need to talk to you.”

“Okay mom.”

“I just wanted to talk to you about your relationship with Elisabeth.” (Very smooth.)

“What about it?”

“You know that your fifteen and been seeing her for a while right.” (Like he wouldn’t know that.)

“I know that, what about it.”

“Do you know that if you every need to talk about anything even sex you can come to me or your father?” (Hope you go to your dad.)

“I know that mom, but I have had sex ed and know that I need to take care of things and that there is more to worry about then pregnancy, because there is STD’s out there and mom, its ok because we are no where near any of that but knowing I can talk to you if I need to is great, but I think I’ll talk to dad.”